It’s been over a year since I’ve written anything here, but not over a year since I’ve thought about it.
I think about it all the time but have made a bad habit of letting life and mostly excuses get in the way.
Soon, more life and excuses will get in the way but I at least can say that a device is not one of them. I’ve now got something portable again to keep up. Writing isn’t easy when you’re only on your phone.
In the last year, a lot has happened.
New role, same company
In January, I started a new role at the company I’ve been working at for the past 6 years. To completely pivot from what you’re normally used to day in and day out is always a challenge, and my role change has kept to that. I’ve gone from an every day internet marketer that had quite a handle on SEO to an Education Manager, training and developing employees at an agency.
My knowledge in the industry is certainly an advantage, but it’s been an equally frustrating and rewarding experience to realize just how much I need to learn in terms of developing people in their careers. What’s daunting about that is that I believe you have to first be able to lead yourself before you lead others. I’ve had my fair share of imposter syndrome this year to battle.
I’m nowhere near an expert (nor will I ever claim to be) but I’ve got almost a year under my belt of trying and working at something new to make other people and myself better. I look at that as a victory even if I feel like I’ve personally stubbed my toes on every single corner possible.
All I can think about is how lucky I am to have the opportunity where I can say that THIS is my job.
Any day now, my husband and I will be welcoming a baby.
I don’t know exactly how or all the ways my life is going to change but I know it’s going to be paramount and turn my world upside down for the better.
My mom has always said the my sister and I are her greatest accomplishments. I never understood that until being days away from having my first child. Pregnancy is hard…or at least it’s been for me. It’s by far the hardest thing I’ve ever done…when you think about it, growing a human is no small task.
But I get it now. I’m days away from my greatest accomplishment where my most important goal will be to raise a kind human with my husband.
What a purpose I’ve instantly been given.
A big question I’ve asked myself is how parenthood will impact my creative output, thoughts, and work.
Like everything, everyone has their own opinion.
The most common answer is from those who say you won’t have time for anything like you used to. Thank you… Obviously I’ll have to manage my time differently with a child. I won’t have hours upon hours for reading, writing, etc. But I’ll still have time. And when I have it, will I sit mindlessly scrolling through Facebook on my phone or will I open a book? It’s the same struggle.
People tend to forget that in order to have output creatively or through your work, you have to have input. You make time and you choose your input, whether you have kids or not.
Someone I know gave a different and interesting perspective…
You get a wonderful opportunity to change with them (baby). There were these artists that I always paid attention to where they embraced the change in a deep and internal way. And a maternal way that had resonance beyond a biological fact. I think you are one of them.
I prefer this perspective because it looks at the opportunity given to change and adapt rather than what’s being taken away.
Just like any change, I imagine parenthood is often about keeping a good perspective.
I cannot wait.